Effective interpersonal communication skills are essential for improving interactions not only with loved ones but also with colleagues in the workplace. Stewart (2012) identifies six critical characteristics of communication. These are meaning, conversation, choice, identities, cultures and nexting. He also states that communication is a collaborative and continuous process of nonverbal and verbal meaning making (Stewart, 2012, p. 15). Overarching Goal My overarching goal (OAG) is to optimize my dialogic and empathetic listening skills. Achieving this goal will entail becoming aware of my internal processes that result in feelings of frustration, negative conflict and stress (Feldman, 2011). The view here is to improve my listening skills …show more content…
Enlarging My Conversation Empathetic listening will aid me to enlarge the conversation via various ways. It will aid me: To be more attentive, to utilize nonverbal cues in order to indicate that I am listening and to establish ground rules. Burley-Allen (1995) contends that establishing the ground rules is essential for making both parties know the limits of the conversation. Stewart (2012) also acknowledges that empathetic listening normally requires three skill sets, which are reflecting, focusing and encouraging (p. 193) Background Influences My background, shaped mainly by being from a strongly religious & middle-class family, has endowed me with both some positive and some negative attributes. With regard to the positive attributes, I must admit that I am Intelligent, able to adjust well, trustworthy, loyal and friendly, flexible, dynamic and multifaceted. I must also confess that I have some weaknesses that can hinder me from being an effective communicator or listener. Some of the more pronounced weaknesses include relative lack of self-confidence, people pleaser, too patient and passive, and sometimes …show more content…
Some of the more disturbing are: Negative self-talk Hearing what I want to hear Burley-Allen (1995, p. 54) asserts that a listening barrier usually exists when we hear what we want to hear rather than what is really communicated. Another potential barrier is interrupting others when they are communicating Solutions to the Barriers There are various solutions that I can implement to overcome all of the aforementioned barriers. Some of these solutions include: Reading the non-verbal cues of the speaker and paying more attention (Sun & Hullman, 2011) Using nexting in the conversation in order to keep it going Morreale, Osborn, & Pearson (2000) also propose asking for clarification and choosing words wisely Avoiding conversations or dialogue during stressful moments Avoid projecting my preconceived biases or assumptions during the conversation Noise Pollution Burley-Allen (1995) acknowledges that noise pollution encompasses all the factors that make us distracted from listening effectively and actively at Level 1. The types of noise pollution are: 1. External noise pollution 2. Internal noise pollution Internal Noise
When it comes to listening, it is quite important to look and grasp even the non-verbal cues that will enable us to truly understand other person’s emotional state of mind. It indirectly initiates an introspection to question our own thoughts, beliefs and actions. This will enable us to take steps towards building better
and felt her distress as she became emotional telling her story. Carl Rogers ( 1980 ) felt very passionately about empathic listening. He states: ''Empathic listening means entering the private perceptual world of the other. It involves being sensitive moment by moment to the changing felt meanings which flow in the other person and temporarily living the others life without making judgements''. ( Rogers, 1980. p.142 ). In being empathic towards the client during the session I also was able to reassure her, particularly when during the session she questioned her own capabilities.
Empathic listening “means entering the private perceptual world of another and becoming thoroughly at home in it. It involves being sensitive, moment-by-moment, to the changing felt meanings which flow in this person, to the fear or rage or tenderness or confusion or whatever that he or she is experiencing. It means temporarily living in the other’s life, moving about in it delicately without making judgements” (Rogers 1980 A Way of Being).
Listening is a skill that requires active, rather than passive, participation to advance shared understanding and minimise misinterpretation. Lang, Floyd and Beine (2000) describe active listening as a skill that ‘focuses on attending to patients’ clues, ie, utterances and/or behaviors that are not explicit but may have special meaning and suggest unshared ideas, concerns, and expectations’. This essay will discuss how active listening strategies such as analysing and displaying non-verbal body language, clarifying meaning and accuracy, expressing understanding for the speaker’s feelings through empathy and silence contribute to effective communication by encouraging the speaker to convey his or her thoughts, building trust and
James Petersen (2007) uses five parts to describe the talking and listening to help us process a better way of communicating and understanding each other. They are provided to help us connect in our relationships with others. According to Petersen, most of us think we listen well, but we don’t. Not
Listen empathically – focus on the person and the emotions that underlie his or her
* I am good listener I allow people to speak and make eye contact quite regularly so the person I am listening to knows they have my undivided attention.
Before doing this log, I did not realize how much of this I did every day. Empathic listening occurred in my days while doing this log when I listen to my roommates talk about if they were physically hurting from a workout and how they hoped it would get better. These conversations occurred typically while icing and we would discuss our pains and give each other the support that we needed at the time. The other times when I caught myself empathic listening was when I was talking to someone who was stressed out about school. It may just be that they are struggling in one class but I listened to them because that is what they needed at the time. Again, from doing this log I learned that empathic listening is crucial and every person needs someone to listen to them empathically. As the listener you do not always have much input but just being there is typical all the person
Dr. Petersen has called The Flat Brain Theory of Emotions. “It explains how our emotions, thinking and relating abilities work and how what goes inside us comes out in the ways we communicated and act.” (Petersen, 2007, p. 8) And without doubt that this is precisely the basis not only for a great communication, but is also related to a great listening.
The opportunity to gauge my personal listening style in the home was exponentially more revealing than any other experience. During conversations with my children, my listening style would vacillate between time-oriented, people-oriented, and content-oriented; sometimes with a combination of two different styles. I found that content-based and time-oriented listening was employed during homework and reading time, whereas people-oriented listening was applied to all other situations. With my fiancée, I realized that the listening styles I use most are that of content and time-based listening. We rarely have access to each other, so it unnerved me to awaken to the fact that I didn’t inject the attributes of a people-oriented listener
John Stewart defines communication as a major part of human living (Stewart, 2012, p.16). In the most general sense, the terms “communication” and “communicating” label the continuous, complex, collaborative process of verbal and nonverbal meaning-making. The way Stewart described communication and the six features of communication; meaning, choice, culture, identities, conversation and nexting (Stewart, 2012, p.16). I found myself relating more with the meaning feature of communication, and Stewart goes in depth, describing meaning as a form of communication:
(Dean, 1997). Empathetic listeners must pay attention to the speaker with their entire presence and avoid being distracted from the outside interruptions include focusing on their own response. For Example, the listener should, lean forward, maintain close eye contact, take time to understand the speaker’s words, ask for clarification, repeat a phrase or word, and express genuine concern. Additionally, the speaker should pay close attention to the speaker’s overall communication, such as, body language, thoughts and feelings. (Hagevik, 1999). As quoted in Hicks, 2016, “The context of the person’s story is like watching a movie in black and white, listening for feeling adds the colour.” For successful empathetic listening, the listener needs to listen to understand rather than listening to reply. (Dean, 1997). Furthermore, an empathetic listener must listen from the heart so they can develop a real understanding for the speaker’s words and emotions. (Hagevik, 1999). To develop progression and a close relationship between the listener and the speaker Dr Rogers believes that empathetic listening is an essential key in communication as the speaker may feel as though someone does care about them and their issues as they are finally being heard and understood.
The purpose of this memo is to evaluate my listening skills, assess my strengths and weaknesses, and describe how I can improve my skills. My listening self-assessment score of 36 indicates that, although my skill level is decent, I have room to improve significantly. I regularly attend professional meetings where either informational listening or critical listening is required. Despite this, I consider my listening skills subpar and am aware of my need for improvement. In understanding how I can improve, I must first assess my strengths and weaknesses.
Despite some of the major improvements I need to make to my communication skills, I was also able to discover a few strengths I have with communicating. One of my major strengths is my ability to empathize with other people. My score for the empathy quotient assessment was above the average female score. I found this score to be relevant because I pick up easily on the way other people are feeling. I also easily can put myself into other people’s shoes and see things from their perspective. I experience the greatest joy in
listening has different roles in the methods. It was found that behaviorism limits listening to